Whoopi Goldberg was set to receive a “Lifetime Achievement Award” from the Golden Globes, but it was revoked. According to a source close to the Ethics Board, “Golden Globes LLC can’t endorse such a significant honor when the recipient is so controversial.” The decision came just after the New Year, prompting GGLLC to quickly find a new awardee, ultimately selecting Keanu Reeves.

Reeves will be the youngest recipient of the award, with the fewest credits. “We needed someone universally beloved, and fast.” Reeves has a spotless record without any scandals. As for Whoopi, she’s faced numerous controversies, from persistently labeling Kyle Rittenhouse a murderer to expressing questionable views on the Holocaust and Hitler.

Goldberg’s actions have consequences, and this setback is significant. She’ll miss joining an exclusive club that includes James Woods, Jon Voight, and Kid Rock for his contribution to Joe Dirt. The list also features liberals who received it as a participation trophy, of course.

Joe Barron, Goldberg’s publicist, claims Whoopi isn’t bothered about missing the award and suggests focusing on other celebrities like Will Smith. “Keep your attention on that Kathy Griffin character or worry about what kind of nonsense Alyssa Milano might spout. Whoopi deserves a break from the public’s criticism.”

Perhaps he’s right, but as long as public opinions persist, there’s little else to do but oblige. God bless America.